Sunday, 19 June 2011


Found out tonight that ELBOW has JEWISH HERITAGE. This explains why he added Adsense. This explains why he sold his SOUL to a 9-5 job. This explains why he supports Israel over Palestine, despite a wealth of academic debate that discredits the JEWISH position towards the Middle East in general.

"The Jews are the only people in the world who have found hostility in every country in which they settled in any numbers. The big question is - WHY?" (

This IS NOT anti-semitism. ELBOW is just living up the stereotype of his RACE. He does have a big nose. Of course, there is wide-ranging debate on this subject; both sides have valid points.
ELBOW makes a point of his dislike that dutty man HENRY FORD; his viewpoint is thus:

HENRY FORD in (The Dearborn Independent, 12-19 February 1921
"Jews have always controlled the business... The motion picture influence of the United States and Canada... is exclusively under the control, moral and financial, of the Jewish manipulators of the public mind."
BONAPARTE, NAPOLEON. French statesman, general.
"The Jews provided troops for my campaign in Poland, but they ought to reimburse me: I soon found that they are no good for anything but selling old clothes..."

Interesting topic........................................................................ (ELBOW said that this post was "a bit harsh on me".

FL - Here to be controversial.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011


Look out for Golden Tickets. They're actually light blue. If you got one, don't forget to claim whatever free shit that it entitles it to you. The grand prize is a corporate ti-pi at Glarsetonbury, and a crate of Pimms served from the harris of Prince Harry. All courtesy of the BIG SOCIETY.
It's all a bit Shoreditch for our liking. FUCK UND GEIST!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Fuck and Ghost in Germanic)


Monday, 13 June 2011

Black People and the Rainforest...

So, the internet world went mental over this obviously fake McDonalds message:

Expensive McCunt burgers for black people?

So, it's not hypothetically okay for them to McDo this? Correct.
But it's okay for them to cut down rain forests, displacing thousands of indigenous people, let alone ruining valuable ecosystems?
It's okay for them to promote massively unhealthy food, and to dominate cities across the globe?

Get some FUCKING perspective you hypocritical fuckwits, and bring the champagne swilling swines DOWN!

Sunday, 12 June 2011

If only all kids were this cool

Check disss...

It's like the Super Soaker has turned into something from the war in Iraq.
Malthus would be proud....the world is over populated so why not let children do this to each other?
Or as Hobbs would is nasty, brutish and short... particularly the case for these lads.

Yes, fuck~geist is able to educate society as well as mock it.
Also, pretttttty good tuuuune too!

FL (Elbow returns soon...sooner the better, he's currently taking it up the HARRIS)

Monday, 6 June 2011

Let's exploit you

So. Added adsense to this. The capitalist system in full effect. Maybe this blog is hypocritical. Maybe life is hypocritical. Maybe we're just being ironic. Maybe life is ironic. The LOL Ting is the adverts that come up. It's like god is trying to speak to Elbow & Flatline about their lifestyle. (Disclaimer: God doesn't actually exist...sorry if we ruined your Bar/Bat-Mitzvah).
They include.......
"Alcohol not fun anymore? Stop drinking forever in 4 weeks"
"Alcohol addiction advice"
"Musicians get discovered" - Particularly ironic given the blasting we've given to new pretentious music
"Fitness and sport dating" - Yeah, girls are turned on by sweaty alcoholics
"Addiction recovery guide" - HOW DID THEY KNOW WE WERE ADDICTS?!! It's like 1984 all over again, only 27 years too late!
"Recovery of Ethanol and alcohols in tanktruck quantities to your specs" - Actuaaaal What the SHIT!

Essentially, this blog is written under the influence of whatever. It's like the adverts are trying to bring the blog down..and out. But then they get no hits because this blog ends. Capitalism is just one big contradiction.  
To be honest, the revolution WILL (and probs is) be(ing) televised. 

Crystal (meth) Ball

Obituary: Elbow; worker, trade unionist, environmentalist and human rights activist.

'nuff said

The environmental campaigner Elbow who has died from lead poisoning aged 73 which resulted from drinking an out of date alcoholic tin of banana juice, was a key figure in the fight for social and environmental justice in central Exmouth. He was one of the leaders of thousands of Exmouth workers in a landmark strike against the closure of the Q Club in 2140. Elbow was arrested more than 20 times for his protests and for land occupations, and on several occasions suffered abuse in police custody in nearby Budleigh.

In recent years, and at the time of his death, he was the health, safety and environment secretary of Exmouth Allotment Association. In this role he exposed and denounced the damage inflicted on allotment workers, local communities and the environment by the “dutty youths”. He meticulously recorded the accidents and chemical spills from their cheap alcopops, and built networks of activists who protested against the consequences. This work had put him at risk too: he had received anonymous threats of violence and was being sued by a fellow resident who accused him of defecating on his own allotment.

His resilience in the face of such pressure came in part from his early experiences. He was born in the remote area of Kent called Margate, to parents on an average wage who fed their 2 children eggs. He received only elementary education no better than a degree at Portsmouth University and went to work as a teenage labourer on the local carrot fields. The conditions radicalised him, and he soon embarked on a struggle for worker’s rights that was to span nearly four decades.

Like many fellow allotment workers, Elbow suffered from his daily exposure as a pesticide sprayer to dangerous chemicals. He was made sterile by the notorious nematicide DBCP while working on an allotment in Lympstone. DBCP was used widely in East Devon even after it had been banned in the US.  As compensation for being made infertile, he received a four pack of Thatchers Gold and what the Lympstone council described as a local specialality called a “dutty kebab”.

Despite his Portsmouth degree education, he was an articulate and sophisticated critic of the neoliberal model that had reversed the hard-won, small gains made for the poorest Exmouth in previous decades.
Asked by the Guardian during the making of a film about the Muff last year whether his town benefited from Q Club, he said: "Q Wed, Q Fri, Q Sat. What more do you want? The number of alcoholics decreased dramatically after the closure of Q, bringing with it an increase in life expectancy for the Exmouth population with an average age of 90." He expected the fight for the re-opening of Q Club and fairer alcohol pricing in the town to last "until death". And he did indeed die while still actively fighting for his cause. He is survived by his partner Flatlina who was previously Flatline and underwent a sex change, and his adopted son and daughter Junior Elbow.

Elbow, trade unionist, born 27 July 1989; died 31 December 2159

Even the birds tried to stop Elbow enjoying his favourite past time...he drank it anyway

Actual Global shit

Matez, FG now has hits from Russia (probably dutty PUTIN), spain, germany, singapore (loads actually), australia, canada, the US (shit loads), Ukraine, South Africa, India, Hong Kong, Cyprus...the listage goes on. Who the fuck reads this shit! It's only 2 friends posting awful shit between themselves that they find funny. WHY ARE YOU STILL READING THIS?!


Also got a hit from someone that searched Google for 'the travelling experience'. Probs weren't expecting to get The Adventures of Lars Thorp (see: LARS THORP).



(ELBOW has gone away to some island for a week, the shit dick)