Entente Cordial

What with this furore around Gadaffi, who was exclusively revealed as the manager of the new music alliance between our favourite politicans, the planned album and tour have stalled. However, we can reveal that the group have decided to call themselves 'Entente Cordiale'.

The band have had to postpone a tour and album release because, in his own words, Blair explained, "I've got this little mess to clear up in the Middle East as UN Envoy. Cherie isn't happy, I'm not happy, but these blasted Israelis and Palestinians keep throwing bombs around like little Ewan does when shouting pro-Cameron soundbites at Cherie in the morning". Sounds intense.

However, FUCKGEIST can exclusively reveal (in more ways than one), the new cover for the forthcoming album. Gordon Brown explained the reasoning behind the decision to have Clinton and Al Gore in skimpy costumes: "Well, I think of it (weird breath in) as Bill has a strong sexual appeal that is better than a poster girl (weird breath in), and Al Gore shows that as a group we are very hypocritical".

More news soon, folks.....

Royal Marine Exercise in Lympstone Village

Setting the scene: Near to a village in East Devon, called Lympstone, there is a Royal Marines Commando "Training" Centre. Each year, the marines take over the village, and this culminates in the new officers that are 'passing out' (no, not after a night at QCLUB) apprehending 'criminals' from one of the local pubs. Obviously this attracts quite a few locals, and these are actively encouraged to resist this arrest. They are given a talk half an hour before the 'arrest', and even told a safety word, in this case 'VIKING', in case they need to call things to a halt.

FLATLINE was part of this 'resistance', and as much fun as it may have been getting to call marines 'cunts' and pushing them around causing a fuss, it painted a real, true and quite saddening image of what people from our country do in the name of the government. Just from a practice exercise, FLATLINE has a bruise. Weak man.

Just imagine this happening in a village in a remote part of Afghanistan, or Iraq, or anywhere that our supposed government has invaded. The 'media' wonders why people "representing" our "country" (the interests of Multi National Companies) are met with such hatred. Because they act like total badmen, AND they believe they are working for some sort of 'good cause'.

McJob........McCunt?

Graduate career advice. Check out Douglas Coupland. He explains your current situation. Generation X/Generation A. He understands.
Scenario A: Get a high-pressure job that provides MONEY at the expense of a life - be unhappy
Scenario B: Get an unskilled, low pressure job; understand why you are doing it = have the freedom to have a "fun" life, but have no working dignity.
Scenario C: Kill yourself.

Average mindset of a human when confronted with these scenarios:
A. No! B. A. B. Oh fuck it...C....Goodbye!

OR....Get a transit van. Be Men with Ven. You will always find a job ripping off old ladies.

New Music: Clinton, Blair, Brown, Putin, Obama and Bush Unite to Form Musical Supergroup - Touring Soon!

We've been working on this for months now, and we are now proud to announce the formation of a new band. Presenting to you, for one night only folks, THE G6:

WE GOT TONY BLAIR ON LEAD GUITAR

WE GOT BA-RACK O-BAMA ON DRUMS

WE GOT PUTIN ON PIANO

THE BIG BOOOOOSH ON VOCALS AND BACKING GUITAR

WE GOT GORDON BROWN ON BASS 

WE GOT BILL CLINTON ON SAX

Gadaffi is currently managing the band. He's already managed to cool off Brown and Blair's arguments, and Clinton's high sex drive. Hardline = BASSLINE.

The band formed after a chance meeting at the Stone Circle at Glastonbury Festival 2011. A trio of gentlemen tripping on Acid brought the group together, and told them of their dream that the sextuplet would form a political supergroup. They had been watching Coldplay that evening, and persuaded the group to form by stating: "If Chris Cunting Martin can do it, so can you". That was all it took. 4 months later, here we are.
Tour dates coming soon...watch this space!

THE BIG BOOOSH 

Caning the hits

Getting a series of big hitters on the blog. Mostly from the United States. What is going on? Obama looking for some re-election advice? Here's some advice Obama: buy a leather jacket, walk into the Senate/Congress. Lay out your plans for America - Go HAM. Nobody will fucking mess with you if you wear a leather jacket. Give leather jackets out to your lads in the 'stan, the Taliban will shit it.